NEWS ITEM: Little Switzerland buys Switzerland...
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Thread: NEWS ITEM: Little Switzerland buys Switzerland...

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  1. #1
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    NEWS ITEM: Little Switzerland buys Switzerland...

    In a surprising move to ensure a steady supply of timepieces for its chain of Caribbean jewelry stores, retailer Little Switzerland has finalized a deal to purchase the Alpine country of Switzerland.

    The breakthrough in negotiations came about when the retailer agreed to assume Switzerland's WWII wartime reparation debt, which LS CEO Hapatha 'Benny' Patel said would be reimbursed to future Little Switzerland customers in the form of a 20% discount coupon to be distributed through 'Caribbean Travel & Life' magazine.

    Plans are also in motion to drain Switzerland's Lake Geneva to provide a source of fresh water to the islands, enabling several Caribbean nations to convert their desalinization plants to retail LS outlets. Stock in most Swiss watch brands tumbled immediately upon release of the news, with the exception of Vacheron Constantin, which said it hadn't sold a watch in years and didn't think they would be affected.
    Last edited by Stoshman; March 29th, 2017 at 14:13.
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    Re: NEWS ITEM: Little Switzerland buys Switzerland...

    I laughed at the VC bit. :)
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  3. #3
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    Re: NEWS ITEM: Little Switzerland buys Switzerland...

    It was only a matter of time...
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