Washington Post annual neologism contest....
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  1. #1
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    Washington Post annual neologism contest....

    Once again The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words.
    The winners are:

    1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
    2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
    3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
    4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
    5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
    6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
    7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
    8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavored mouthwash.
    9. Flatulence (n.), emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
    10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
    11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
    12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
    13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
    14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
    15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
    16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

    The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

    The winners are:

    1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
    2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
    3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
    4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
    5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
    6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
    7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
    8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
    9. Karmageddon (n): It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
    10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
    11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
    12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
    13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
    14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
    15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

    And the pick of the literature:
    16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an ........
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  2. #2
    Member Statius's Avatar
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    Re: Washington Post annual neologism contest....

    I like lymph. Though many of these strike me more as portmanteaus than neologisms.
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    Member KCWrist's Avatar
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    Re: Washington Post annual neologism contest....

    Quote Originally Posted by Statius View Post
    I like lymph. Though many of these strike me more as portmanteaus than neologisms.
    The first list are all neologisms, they aren't a combination of words, just newly applied meanings.

    The second list would not be neologisms, but they weren't referenced as such either. It is questionable that they are portmanteaus as well, for some of them, though there are some that would fit that definition.
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    Conan: To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

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    Re: Washington Post annual neologism contest....

    lol Pokemon. Thanks for sharing, that made my morning.

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    Re: Washington Post annual neologism contest....

    14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

    made my lol a little

    Thanks for sharing!

  7. #6
    WnS
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    Re: Washington Post annual neologism contest....

    Haha, a very entertaining read.

    14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

    And I can never find them with the light on. I resort to applying lots and lots of mosquito repellant to myself.

    ...

    According to the watch snob.

    Tool Watch: A watch worn by a tool.
    I'm content with my watch collection

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